"I love the smell of race fuel in the morning. It smells like victory!"
Barry Wilcock
Pit Crew: Tumenas Motorsports/Houndspeed, Fat Boy Racing
Brian, best wishes for 2014; this year has been tough for you. I want to personally wish you nothing but blue skies and more recovery for the coming year.
I could not help but think of you and your recovery given what has happened to Michael Schumacher. Brain injuries are more common than many people think.
Brian,you are truly one lucky guy. Let's all keep praying for continued recovery and that you get some more great news for 2014. Next step is an awesome job with great benefits and a fat pay check!!
Best, Tom
Tom Owen
Owner - Browns Lane and Racelaminates.com
My positive attitude is the main reason I'm doing so well so fast, and surprising my doctors! My older posts kinda came across like I was mad or trying to blame someone for my accident, but I never was. Even if somebody actually bumped me off the track causing my crash, and I was yelling at him face to face, it doesn't erase my current issues! I would never wish my injuries or losing everything good going for them at that time, because I still wouldn't change my problems.
I heard about Schumacher's crash yesterday. He has a long road a head of him if he survives. It sounds like his brain injury was worse than mine, so knowing what I went through, he may be better off dying I hate to think or say that, but my issues alone were bad enough! And if he does survive he'll quickly find out who his real friends/family are. Brain injuries are known as the "invisible injury". While a person with TBI may look fine physically, no stitches or casts, they can't see the war he may be engaged in inside their head!
Brian
Last edited by Brian331; 01.03.14 at 2:05 PM.
I think with this positive attitude you need to go help Michael and his family out! Could be the way to 'stay in motorsports' like you intend.
I'm sure the family is being flooded with emails, but I do really think a link to your story could help them out at this time.
-John Allen
Tacoma, WA
'82 Royale RP31M
(‘72 Royale RP16 stolen in 2022)
Brian
I'm really glad that you stop by Apex and keep us up-to-date on your progress. I'm elated that your recovery has proceed so well.
I hope your 2014 goes even better than this year
See ya at the races
Terry
Brian,
I knew nothing of your saga until the past hour, and just wanted to send my support and well wishes to you. You are a hell of a man, and your story is incredible.
Thanks also for driving the massage home the importance of side impact protection - it is downright scary what head trauma can do. In fact, thanks to Purple Frog and everyone who chimed in on that thread ( http://www.apexspeed.com/forums/show...=sideways+head ).
If I ever get to meet you, Brian, the beer is on me. Until then, I wish you continued success in your recovery, and hope to read about your first autocross soon.
Oh, and your comment about Coop just cracked me up!
Godspeed, Brian. You rock!
- John
John Terry.....apex community,
I see that someone posted about "Sebring MAJOR and races", but this is more important! This puts me in the lead for thread replies at 246, so I finally won something! With the important stuff out of the way.......
Seriously though I did find another picture that I had thought I deleted from my picture file on my computer. I went into my coma after the crash on 6/8/12, but I didn't actually get home from the hospital until early September. In this picture I'm sitting next to my mom, or a few days out of my coma. Notice in that picture how limp the left side of my entire face is. While it looks like my left arm is resting on the side of the wheelchair, but that was as straight as I could even get my left arm. Before I was ever even awake from my coma they had to put brace on my left arm, that they would crank a little more everyday.
The other picture I posted a year to the day of my crash on 6/8/12, or ten months out of the hospital. There is clearly a big physical difference between them both, so you can see how determined I am to get better ASAP!
I really just wanted to post this other picture of me so it may inspire someone. While I hope/pray that none of you ever have to go through anything like this, if something crazy did happen, then you could fall back on my injury thread for motivation.
The pictures I just posted can show you how far I've come in just 10 months time.
1) Coma
2) sitting next to my mom, left side of my body is F-ed up
3) 10 months after the crash that put me into picture #1
Oh.....and I haven't had a drink since before my accident on 6/8/12, so I'm quitting for good! So save your money guys!
Brian
+1 = 247
Caldwell D9B - Sold
Crossle' 30/32/45 Mongrel - Sold
RF94 Monoshock - here goes nothin'
I own a race car, I don't (can't?) 'save my money'!
Still hope to meet you someday, I'll spring for a Coke!
-John Allen
Tacoma, WA
'82 Royale RP31M
(‘72 Royale RP16 stolen in 2022)
Wow, Brian, your recovery is amazing when comparing those two pictures. Keep it up, brother!
As for the beverage, I'll buy you whatever you are drinking!
Cheers!
Brian, I want to voice my respect for your parents who have gone through an awful experience; seeing one you love in such a terrible state. Be sure and tell them for me how brave and strong they have (obviously) been for you. I can only imagine the pain they suffered along with you.
It is incredible to see how well you have adapted as well as recovered; this is due (in no small part!) to your positive attitude as well as your obvious powerful work ethic.
Good on ya, mate!
Wishing you ALL the best for 2014 and beyond.
Tom
Tom Owen
Owner - Browns Lane and Racelaminates.com
Amazing before & after pictures ! You make a mighty fine pirate
"An analog man living in a digital world"
Truly Amazing recovery. Go for the gold
Brian ,
I remain in awe of you and your family for the courage and strength.
I look forward to chatting some time if you visit a race.
All the best!!! Keep healing!
Steve
Guys,
Thank you for the nice words! It's truly been a loooooong road. I screwed up the picture details. That picture of me wearing the blue shirt was taken a year to the day of my accident, so the 10 months was how long it's been since I was released from the hospital. That picture of me sitting next to my mom was probably actually taken on my first day sitting up, judging by I hadn't shaved yet haha! I have been getting my hair cut by the same kid since high school, so after he heard about my freak crash, he drove all the way to NY to cut my hair in the hospital. Him driving all the way there back and forth just to cut my hair, really showed me his true character!!
Could any of you even imagine going over a single week without even being able to drive yourself around in a street car? The last time I drove a street car, was when I towed my FF to LRP to race. I always thought racing at LRP was fun and safe Me having to relearn EVERYTHING has been tough and annoying at times, but my determination to get better drives me.
And Steve, I will will see you for sure next year at LRP. If I don't see you before hand trying to land myself a new job where you work
Brian
Why no more accidents/concussions? Has there been a lose of brain cells and there are not enough left in reserve?
Brian
No more accidents?
I had 4 sets of stitches and plastic surgery to repair my face, before I was even 5 years old! My older brother bet me that I couldn't climb up our dresser and jump off it on to my bed. I made my mouth a lot bigger requiring plastic surgery to repair it, but I did make it. I had double hernia surgery before I even attended first grade. After countless more stitches, I got involved in a pretty bad car accident, but my older brother was driving. I ended up fracturing my shoulder and tearing the ligaments. Nothing 2 pins in my shoulder couldn't fix! I then fell off a step ladder helping my father at work breaking my heal. So I don't look good on paper!
My mom blames every gray hair she has on me, neither of my other 2 brothers, just me. In fact neither of my other brothers have ever really been inside a hospital before, except to visit me. I think after this time I'll really 'consider' taking it easy, before I make my mom bald
Brian
Last edited by Brian331; 02.21.14 at 4:58 PM.
Brian, the brain does not repair itself like other tissues. Tiny tears in the composition of the brain are the result of each time we suffer trauma; these connective tissues do not heal with time. Any further trauma will cause further tears in the tissues...and further degradation of neural capability. With each successive injury, our neural capabilities are further impaired.
Frontal lobe damage is challenging as this is where our executive functioning occurs; things like understanding sarcasm, for instance is often one of the first things to go; additionally tolerance of high-stimulus environments (like loud music, large groups of people, even trying to have a conversation with the TV on) becomes limited. Our ability to process information becomes slowed and we become less able to process multiple functions at one time....like trying to add numbers in your mind while driving a car.... as well patients often have difficulty "restraining" certain reactive responses....their "filter" has changed and they look at their world in a new way.
People who are supporting a recovering brain trauma patient need to understand that their loved one has changed; that their tolerance of certain things have changed, and that they will need a different environment during (and after) recovery.
Each and every concussion is an irrecoverable injury; luckily most injuries are small enough that impairment is minimal; but it is there. Someone who has suffered a life-threatening injury should not expose themselves to any risk of further injury.
Tom Owen
Owner - Browns Lane and Racelaminates.com
Thanks
Brian
Brian,
Great positive attitude!!I had brain surgery for a benign tumour in 1990
and the recovery period was frightening,they used a new technique to get to my brain lining by going in thro my neck,my neck was incredibly weak after and I found out how heavy ones head is(11LB) approx.I was in la-la land for a while after having your brain operated on and scared stiff but i fought it and 3 months later bought a vee & went racing,although different experience to your injuries I somewhat understand what you went thro.The POSITIVE attitude is the thing,its all frightening,painful and very scary but I still drink beer tho:>)Take care and be safe.
Frank O'Hanlon
Guys...or guys who care,
So I was just asked in another thread "how am I". Being that thread was intended on giving away a few things, I answered Jim's question, but I figured I should post my answer here.
My vision is better but will require anther operation to properly fix. My vision was screwed up pretty bad after the accident, so my vision was border line even repairable. Let me "try" to explain how my vision was before the first surgery. Take 2 business cards (or any cards the same size) and stack them. Then move the top card a 1/2 over on the right side or the bottom card, then move it a 1/2 up over the top edge too. Now take that card you just moved over in 2 different directions, then rotate until the corners are at 2 (top right corner) and 7 o'clock (bottom left corner). So if any of that made sense to you then that's how my vision was. The angle was the biggest concern to him which made the surgery border line.
After the first operation the angle is basically gone, but the edges of the card is still over to the top and right. The eye doctor is really optimistic about this next surgery given the angle is basically gone, but I'll have to wait and see!
To think I actually sold my 2004 Suzuki GSXR 1000 to follow my dreams of racing. I sold it because motorcycles are dangerous, so I figured racing would be safer haha
And I should apologize to everyone for my piss poor English and punctuation in all my older posts. I just put commas where "I think" they should go, so there all probably wrong. I would blame my "massive" brain injury for my crappy English skills, but I sucked at it in school too.
Brian (former FF #31)
Glad to hear you're making such good progress. As far as the bike goes.... I got clipped on mine three times in one year & went back to cars. Rednecks & one crazy old lady who came up alongside to pass me & then turned hard into me. Fortunately, the ditch was fairly smooth & I missed the power poles Your resolve to get well is inspiring ! Keep it up !
"An analog man living in a digital world"
Brian, keep up the great work! There are always peaks and valleys in any recovery; yours is not yet finished! This is all great news and we are all pulling for you; let's hope this next surgery repairs your vision completely. When I broke my back at Mosport it took three years of healing to get me well enough for surgery, then it took a couple of years more to heal from it. But I stuck it out and have had 20 years of walking around with no canes or limps
We have all been very grateful that you have come so far in your recovery. It sucks that you were injured so severely. You are one in a million!! You are going to beat this vision challenge and will soon be able to put this part of your recovery behind you. Keep it up!!
Best, Tom
Tom Owen
Owner - Browns Lane and Racelaminates.com
Guys,
First my next surgery date is April 2nd, so it's coming up I probably should have said that before, but I forgot because of my "massive" brain injury! I didn't realy forget, but I should get some kind of use/benefit from my brain injury
Second, there is a link to this video on Youtube "my brother's journey through through a traumatic brain injury-survivor" that I would post to this thread, but I'm completely clueless to knowing how to do it! I have always sucked on computers....but now I can now blame the brain injury excuse....right? That kid in that video isn't me, nor any kind of family member, but it somewhat explains what I went through. I was as skinny as that kid looks in the video, and I also had problems keeping my head up like him. I'm 6"1' and currently weight 185 now. When I got released from the hospital my weight was down to 142, and couldn't ever do 1 push-up. I also always had extremely good eye sight 20/10, which is rare according to my doctor. I now exercise daily now to continually improve my condition! Besides the heartbeat sensations that I feel in my head daily and vision issues, I'm probably basically fully healed. The heartbeat like sensations actually feel like my brain is moving when it beats with my heart. I know my brain isn't moving, but it sure as hell feels like it is. The sensations aren't painful at all, but they are extremely uncomfortable! My neurologist has tested everything and can't see what causes the my heartbeat like sensations. He did say that it "may" heal over time, but it "may never" heal. He also said that given the amount of actual brain damage I had and my overall physical recovery, that my heartbeat like sensations is minor being it could be/should be dead!!
Guys....if someone doesn't post the link to that video, I highly recommend watching it. It is only a 5+ minute long video so it's not long, but shows what I went through, more than reading the words I write.
Brian (former FF#31)
Last edited by Brian331; 04.17.14 at 10:23 AM.
Oh yeah (insert brain injury excuse) I'm now excepting Facebook friends applications if anyone is interested? I was never a big Facebook guy before my accident, but since I'm stuck at home/prison 90% of the day, I figured why not entertain myself a little
I recently asked about 10 different people who are members to this site if they wanted to be friends! Being the Apex community has done TONS for my, like money help and advise, it's the least I can do. My profile is open to the public so you don't have to become my FB friend if you wanted to stalk me
Brian (former FF #31)
Brian,
I am too old for facebook, or I'd link in. Drop a post every now and then, as I check this thread off and on. Good luck with the eye surgery.
[BTW: Don't believe all the wonderful things people say they are doing on facebook. It is reported to cause people problems, thinking they are "not cool" or unpopular or boring, and to cause depression. Just be aware it isn't always as presented, stay the phenomenal person you seem to be, and enjoy the fact that you beat the odds in a big way.]
Jim
Swift DB-1
Talent usually ends up in front, but fun goes from the front of the grid all the way to the back.
Guys,
I did have my second eye surgery yesterday afternoon. While I basically didn't have any pain after my first surgery, this time was different. I can take a lot of pain IMO, but I felt like crying last night! This morning isn't as painful but I couldn't even open one of my eyes. The eye doctor did a more involved surgery this time, but more so on my right side! My eye lashes were stuck together bad enough this morning, that I had to keep a warn facecloth pressed against it for a few minutes. Anytime my eyes change directions causing my eyes to refocus it's extremely uncomfortable. I don't get any pain sensations whatsoever if I just keep my eyes closed laying in bed doing nothing, so I've decided to just lay in bed all day doing completely nothing at all
I still have no regrets at all about getting hurt so bad racing! Racing was my lifelong dream, so knowing most people never get a chance to realize their dreams, I consider myself very fortunate!
Brian
Brian, hopefully the pain from this one will be well worth it! When did the doctor say they would be able to determine how successful or unsuccessful this surgery was?
Sounds like a scratched cornea. Takes 24 hours to heal. Healing is best done with eyes closed and not moving.
Brian,
Unless they told you to expect the pain, call your surgeon now. You may be experiencing nothing unexpected, but if not, early re-evaluation would be important.
Jim
Swift DB-1
Talent usually ends up in front, but fun goes from the front of the grid all the way to the back.
Dennis....it will take at least a month to properly heal! He told me that they over adjust the nerves to start. Once they start to heal they will retract to where it should be. My vision is actually worse now when I remove my eye patch, than it was before surgery. I will see the doctor next Thursday for a check up. After I see him on Thurs I'll be able to remove my eye patch for a little while, so my brain can relearn how to focus both eyes at once. If it turns out that I'll need a third surgery then I'll be making another appt.
Jim.....The doctor himself actually called me on my cell this morning to see how I was doing. I told him about the pain I was in, and he said it was normal given how much he did. He actually operated on both eyes this time with more work done to my right side. He also said that it was normal to have (some crazy doctor term he used) leakage out of my eyes!
My accident was almost 2 years ago and I'm still healing from it. In spite of everything I went through, and still going through, I have no regrets about racing period! I knew before I ever started that it was a very dangerous sport, so while I never considered all these problems, I still have no regrets.
Brian
Last edited by Brian331; 05.03.14 at 6:07 PM.
I think it's crazy that the doctors can even do this sort of stuff. Pretty amazing. I give you a lot of credit for going through all these surgeries. I'm sure you'll come out on top just like you did with everything else.
Your incredibly positive attitude sets the bar for the rest of us Keep up the good work ! Stay patient. You're making fantastic progress !
"An analog man living in a digital world"
Brian - stop reading these and let your eyes rest. All the comments will be here next week.
Ed
praying for u always brain ur an insperation for all of us
Tahoez....^^^I too pray for my "brain" to continue healing^^^
My overall positive attitude is my guide through life presently! While I've suffered through my fair share of obsessing issues regarding certain things, nothing about my loses etc. I have been lucky to obsess about my recovery more than loses. I actually had a doctor tell me before I got released from the hospital, that I might have issues with obsessing. Boy was he ever right! If I ever obsessed about my loses i.e great job, living on my own, dreams of racing gone forever, girl of my dreams walks away at the worst time without a word, not being able to driven a freaking street car or being completely out of shape. Then factor in having to move back in with parents, being completely dependent on them in every respect or them having to drive me everywhere, then I would have committed suicide! Suicides are very high for people with TBI, but that isn't how I roll. I could never put my parents through more emotional distress!
Could any of you even imagine not being able to drive yourself around anywhere for anything? I haven't driven a street car since I towed my FF to the track to race 6/8/12. Hopefully this eye surgery goes well allowing me to be able to be retested for my licence. Then I can try to find a new job to save up money to be able to move back out on my own!
Once I can drive again and move back out on my own, then I'll be able to put this all behind me. Then I could tell people about me learning to walk again, pi$$ again, recovery issues, 2 eye surgeries, losing everything I mentioned and more over a 2 years time, but I'm just playing it up for attention
Brian
20130608_142314.jpg
Just guessing but those arms suggest that you've been pretty busy with the getting back in shape part. Best wishes with this and all other aspects of your recovery.
Sid Smith
That picture was taken by my picture sniper mom a year to date of my accident, not a year to date of me getting home from the hospital! I'm currently 6"1 and weigh 180. When I was released from the hospital I only weighed 143 (still 6"1 ) and couldn't even do 1 single push up! Being I'm a jobless loser that can't drive a car and stuck in prison, I tend to workout or exercise a lot now. Not being able to do a single push up and having to use one of those special chairs designed for old people in the shower, was my inspiration to get better ASAP!
It's because of my overall physical recovery that baffles my doctors, never mind that I'm still alive in general. It's because of the doctor's shaking their heads when they see/meet me that keeps my attitude so positive! I tend to do the most/best I can do while living back at home with my parents/prison Besides after watching tons of shows about people in actual prison being physically jacked, I didn't want to let any of those guys down
Brian
Last edited by Brian331; 05.04.14 at 3:16 PM. Reason: Entered the wrong weight
Guys,
I have this picture posted on my Facebook page, so some of you have probably seen it before! I apologize for not posting the picture to this site first being no one on this site has ever let me down, so you all clearly should have got to see it first. The old saying "better late than never" won't work for this situation, so try to go easy on me! I Know I said that I'm defying the doctors expectations for even being alive, but I now think my story may become a movie. The doctors told me that while I did shock them by surviving, they did said for a fact, that I'd never race again. I think this picture proves that my survival and persistence proves movie worthy!
Oh....and I would have worn my helmet for the pic but Coop told me to never use it again, why temp fate?
Brian.....was former #31 FF racer......now born again FA racer
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